Sunday, September 4, 2011

Bad drama is bad

(for those who aren't aware of EVP and RS this may seem confusing and this post is in general for my purposes only)

I'm gonna stop research for awhile.
I was in a really bad internet drama over the weekend and its made me rethink some things.
I was officially banned from the EVP and RS forum because of posting a prediction of the future done by Aleister Crowley and mentioning Aleister Crowley. WHO is a philosopher by the way and not a satanist. The church declared him one... he may have dabbled in black arts, but he was more of a philosopher than anything else.

I posted the following:

“In the Aeon of Horus the dualistic approach to religion will be transcended through the abolition of the present notion of a God external to oneself. The two will be united. “Man will no longer worship God as an external factor, as in Paganism, or as an internal state of consciousness, as in Christianity, but will realize his identity with God.” The new Aeon of Horus, based on the union of the male and female polarities, will involve the magical use of semen and ecstasy, culminating in an apotheosis of matter – “in the realization of the old Gnostic notion that matter is not dual but one with the Spirit” — symbolized by the androgynous Baphomet of the Templars and the Illuminati.”

Basically with RS and EVP they claim that they know what's happening behind the veil (yes in the spirit world). So they believe they are basically speaking to spirits, and such who give them information based on the current situation on earth, and why we are here, etc. and that this information comes from the Universal Mind/God. They basically would take a current event, reverse it and analyze it. I have done a fair share of RSing and do respect its ideals and how its used. And its also been scientifically documented as a true phenomena as well (they don't say that its from the Universal Mind/God but they do state that RS is a legitimate phenomena of speech, that when we reversed recorded speech there will be phrases and recognizable things that we do not hear in forward speech).

And they claim that the apocalypse will be an apotheosis which will reunite man with god as one entity, making man apart of god.

However, the way the forum was administered pissed me off.

First, I'd post lots of work regarding my reversals, mixing some mysticism, and my own interpretations in them. And then I wouldn't get any responses for days on end on my posts from the community and the community would get upset because I just wanted a little feedback/acknowledgement for the work I did, otherwise the way I saw it, why bother doing it if no one is appreciating it??

Secondly, I don't care whether something appears good or evil as I don't personally believe that good and evil exist. I upset a lot of members when I said the Reptillians, the ones who've been causing much of the war and pain here on earth, I said that the Reptillians weren't evil.. because I don't believe in good and evil because in order to be "united" you need Dualism... yes I did just contradict myself, but that's Dualism in action... Its just my way of accepting similarities and differences. Most of the members disagreed with me... they said they were the Epitome of Evil. That they should express hate towards them. I said that in order to heal and move on we should accept the Reptillians for what they've done and forgive them. Sure they've tortured us and done everything they could possibly think of to make our lives terrible and a nightmare to live in. But... producing hate, and expressing it towards any entity doesn't do anything or anyone good. It won't help us heal at all.

That was the first time I think I really affected my reputation there...

In general the mod that banned me said that I was bringing up old drama and BS that they covered a long time ago... well I'm sorry, I don't have time to read the 500 page + archive. Please point me in the right direction where those Reversals are listed, I'll be happy to read them. They never did.

They also said that I appeared "lonely and unstable" in my posts and that my posts made a lot of the members uncomfortable. I apparently also brought stress and other unnecessary behind-the-scene drama that they apparently didn't want to deal with anymore.

I apparently offended the mod who banned me so much that she continued to make assumptions about how I spoke to her in emails.

I may have cussed twice at her because I was upset.
I may have not used proper grammar because I was upset.
And through this she assumed that I:
-Smoked (I don't, I have respiratory problems)
-Took medication (I dont)
and assumed a lot of other things that I obviously don't do just because I didn't use proper grammar and posted BS about our so-called ancient past and such and that I didn't seem to take a hint (well if I'm making a mistake perhaps you should tell me?).

I had only been there for three-four months and that's a relatively new member... to that forum at least

I don't have access to the messages anymore but the way she wrote and treated me in her messages was absolutely disgusting.

I had never been hurt so much by someone from the internet. I usually don't CARE if I get into internet drama. But if it gets personal like this one did, then it starts to hurt.

Because my research is relatively close to me and its something I enjoy doing when I have the time.

That's why I came to EVP and RS because it reflected my research really well.
Well, I guess this is an end of an era... a very short era. I probably won't be doing much RSing now, just because I don't have a community that will look at the work that I've done. But now I do have their insight about the physical world and our purpose here. That's something to take away, definitely.

In my opinion, I have done nothing wrong. The actions of the administrator was unjust and made me completely loose faith in RS and EVP (or at least the information that was being offered, not the phenomena itself).

It just saddens me that it had to end like this.

But its made me rethink my research a bit.
It seems lately, all I've been doing is offending people.
Which isn't getting anywhere with my mission in trying to enlighten people.
I understand that truth is often denied first before it is accepted. But this is getting ridiculous.

I'm pretty much over it now. But a lot of the hurt I think I've been experiencing is from shock.

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